
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Acting like a Republican
Earlier this month, in the comment thread of my post about my new computer, I made this remark in response to Kate‘s comment about the purchase:
On top of that, there was something of a Republican approach behind the decision to buy a new machine, and a flat-panel, and new MS Office, and new Quicken, and new Norton stuff. I’ll have more to say about that in a future blog posting.
This is that blog posting.
First off, let me hasten to explain some of the many ways in which I am not acting like a Republican. Borrowed and adapted from my pal Darryl at HominidViews, I want to assure all of my readers that I have neither done nor emulated any of these activities:
- unlike George W. Bush, I have not used the NSA to spy on Americans, in clear violation of the law
- unlike Karl Rove, I am not about to be indicted for lying in the Leakergate investigation
- unlike the malAdministration, I have not created secret overseas prisons for suspected terrorists
- unlike the White House, I am not attempting to negotiate stuff out of McCain’s anti-torture bill
- unlike Jack Abramoff, I did not lead a cabal to undertake a (super-sized) Indian Gambling Scandal
- unlike Rummy and Abu Gonzales, I have not authorized torture in Abu Ghraib and Gitmo
- unlike Tom DeLay, I am not under indictment for money laundering, conspiracy, or anything else
- unlike Cheney, Powell, Condi, Perle, Wolfowitz, Bolton, Dubya, et al., I have made no false claims about supposed weapons of mass destruction in Iraq
- unlike George W. Bush, I have neither jokingly not seriously suggested to Tony Blair that the US might bomb Al Jazeera
- unlike the Defense Department, I have not paid a contractor to publish positive stories about the war in Iraqi newspapers
- unlike Bill Frist, I have participated in neither conflict-of-interest stock transactions from (non)blind trusts nor laundered money through charities
- unlike the Bush malAdministration, I have made no illegal payments to the press (Armstrong Williams) and produced no bogus news videos in clear violation of laws prohibiting the use of federal money for propaganda
- unlike Mike Brown and Bush’s FEMA, I did not fail to respond to Hurricane Katrina
How, then, am I acting like a Republican? Click and find out…






